The Grocery Store Experience, Ruth Style

"Honey. Where's the honey?" I talked to myself as I wondered through the Harris Teeter. It keeps me sane and helps me think as I try to locate things in grocery stories. For me, grocery shopping is a necessity and not a joy. It must be done, but it is not something I look forward to. Who does?

This particular day, Mom had asked me to pick up some things that were on sale on my way home. No problem. However, due to the fact I don't frequent grocery stories and that this specific Harris Teeter was oriented opposite to all the other Harris Teeters, I was having difficulty finding the things I needed. I laugh at the idea of what my path through the store would look like if I had red paint on the bottom of my shoes. Up, down. Over. Across. Opps! Better check that aisle, maybe it's there. Zig, zag through the aisle. All the way up one side of the store (looking up at the signs for any "sign" of my item), and all the way back down (looking to the side, scanning the aisles from a distance for any clue). I could spend close to an hour shopping, because of this. I'm perfectly happy trying to figure it out on my own. Here's the rub: there are these people, usually, who are very nice with name tags that say, "How can I help you?" and then they say, "Can I help you with something?"

"No. I'm good." I then try and proceed with my wondering, but in my unorderliness, I keep running into them. Sometimes they shake their heads and laugh, some try and ask again, "Are you sure you don't need any help?" and then others are just too busy to help anybody but themselves, even if I had changed my mind!

Back to my story. Through my individual method I had already found most of the items on my list or come to the conclusion they were not there. I had been asked by this very nice gentleman if I needed help. I, of course, declined, but as I kept trying to find the honey, it kept alluding me. This item I could not conclude would not be there. I mean, what grocery store doesn't have honey?

Finally, I got up the guts to ask the very nice man. His response was quite out of the norm and rather surprising. "Oh no!" he said, with a twinkle in his eye, "You already had your chance!"

Here I get up the guts to admit I need help, in a grocery store no less! and he gives me a hard time! I laughed good naturedly, appreciating his humor; wanting to die due to my pride. After giving me a hard time, I guess he decided he'd had enough fun, and showed me where the honey was.

The *Deer* Show

Some years ago I was at the State Fair with my friend Elizabeth (big surprise there). In the Jim Graham Building, we wandered over to where competitors were showing their sheep. We climbed up and took a seat in the bleachers.

These are some thoughts that were going through Elizabeth's head as we settled in to watch: We're surrounded by these people from the country and we must look and sound like some ignorant city folk. Just need to blend in here... Don't say anything to prove what they might be thinking.

My phone rang.

"Oh! Hey Mom! ... Yeah, we're just over here watching the deer show."

At that moment, Elizabeth tries to imagine sinking into the bleachers and disappearing. Oh no! I am so embarrassed!

I, on the other hand, was oblivious to what I had said. Mentally I thought "sheep" and didn't realize I had said something quite different.

If I remember correctly, after hanging up with Mom, Elizabeth had us make a quick exit from the sheep show.

To this day, when we're at the State Fair and we see the same show going on, Elizabeth will lean over and whisper to me, "Look Ruth. There's the deer show."

We laugh.

Quotes:

At or after the State Fair today, my niece and nephew had this to say:

-

Seeing some large, beautifully decorated moccasins in the Hand Craft & Hobby section, Reuben said, "Grandma, if you put those on you would look like a clown!" A six-year-olds interpretation of Indian culture. We'll have to work on that.

-

"Oh! G-pa, I want some corn!" Reuben said in excitement.

"How would you eat it, buddy?!" G-Pa responded in astonishment.

Reuben's gap of 5 missing teeth, in the front, inhibited his ability to eat this desired food....

-

On the way home, we were explaining some family dynamics to Reuben and Anne Marie. Mom explained that Nathaniel (my older brother and their dad) was her first son, but that Dad already had two girls.

Misunderstanding, Anne Marie responded, "I know boys don't have no babies!"

Of Lateness and A Missing Card

“Ahh! This exit! I knew I was going to mess up here!” I bemoaned the wrong turn I took at the split.

“It said B!?!” Anna was bewildered with our NC signs.

“But this is 40, not Crossroads...” I whined.

“Oh, it’s supposed to be 101 B!”

I tried not to yell too much at the exits that came after Benson/64 and before Cary Parkway. Ever since I first started driving they had caused me no end of grief. Literally.

Coal in My Stocking coincided with Anna saying, “Woohoo!” as I took the sharp round-about. It wouldn’t be the first one I took to get back to the right exit.

“6:15!!?” A glance at the clock told me we were really late. “Quick! Call Heather and tell her I I don’t like that switch and always get lost!” There’s nothing that quite frazzles me as much as being late (and therefore wasting someone else’s time) and getting lost.

We finally pulled into Red Robin and, “Quick! Hand me the card so I can finish writing in it so we can go inside!”

Anna starts looking through her Bible, “Wait...? Where is it?”

Thus began the search. We looked in between the seats, in the purses and bags. No card.

“What’d you do with it?!” My organized personality was feeling highly unorganized and therefore lost and confused, not at all mad at poor Anna.

“I don’t know!”

“You didn’t leave the car!!” I wailed.

“Oh no! There’s the T. family!” When one is late, one thinks irrationally. Why I was so concerned with them being there, since I wasn’t there to see them in the first place, I’m not quite sure. “Oh, good! They don’t see us!”

As soon as they stepped inside, Anna and I opened the doors, pulled the seats back, and rechecked everything, about three times over. To no avail. Poor Anna; she couldn’t stop apologizing.

“Didn’t you have it?” She asked.

“No. I handed it back to you to put in the envelope until we got here.”

Finally, we pronounced the card missing in action. I decided we had kept Heather waiting long enough as it was. I went inside to apologize to poor Heather. Profusely.

Later that evening, after a great dinner and late night talking with fabulous friends, Anna and I went back to the car.

“Alright, before we go, we have to find that card!!” By now, I was no longer frazzled and began to laugh at the lost card and the whole situation.

We began to search everywhere again, but now that it was dark I had my flashlight on. As I was checking between the seat again, the light reflected off of the clear envelope.

Anna and I had a laugh.